This Necklace Perfectly Captures The Essence Of New York's Nightly Dilemma

($26.95, Steven Shein, Karmaloop.com)

Good question, because they ain't gonna pay for themselves. RIGHT, ladies?

It's Time For... CAT FASHIONS!

In honor of my cat Sim's untimely demise, here are a bunch of cheery cat clothes and accessories. Yes, I'm a cat person. DEAL WITH IT. I used to try to air on the side of discretion when shopping for or styling myself with cat-related fashion, so as not to look overly young. But at this point, I'm like fuck it.

($78, Marc By Marc Jacobs, Zappos.com)


($35, Marc By Marc Jacobs, Zappos.com)

Love Marc By Marc Jacobs' Fantastical Tale cat rings in brass and black resin. See? Marc Jacobs gets it!

($76, Your Eyes Lie, Topshop)

British upstart Your Eyes Lie makes excellent, photorealistic digital prints -- like this giant cat print dress -- on the softest jersey dresses. They look fantastic with leggings, run large (yay!), and are super layerable.

($13, Asos.com)

Two baby kitties in a heart ring! Ee!

MAC's Fabulous Felines collection is obviously my favorite collection of all time. When I found out they were doing a cat collection, I almost fell out of my chair. Why I wasn't asked to be a consultant on the collection I will never know, but I'll let it slide. This time.

My favorite of the Fabulous Felines are the Leopard Luxe eyeshadow quad. LOOK at that gold! And that muted orange! So autumnal chic.

($36, MACcosmetics.com)


($14.50, MACcosmetics.com)

Love MAC's Cunning very berry lipstick. It's sold out online, so check your local MAC store.

($25, Paul & Joe Beaute, Beautyhabit.com)

It's CAT LIPSTICK! LIPSTICK IN THE SHAPE OF A CAT! I wrote about it for Naag.

($40, Joseph Aaron Segel, Prettysnake.etsy.com)

Designer and RISD professor Joseph Aaron Segel sources vintage sweater and prints cats and sews hilarious, huge stuffed animals eyes onto them! And check out his Pretty Snake acid cat screenprinted t-shirts!

($38, Joyrich, Karmaloop.com)

LOVE Joyrich because they always have comfie, casual, cheeky streetwear. Love Karmaloop because they ALWAYS have promo codes.

I Bought It Files: Cheap Monday The Blanche Dress in Buffalo Plaid

($56, Cheap Monday, Karmaloop)

I bought this the other week from Epaulet in Brooklyn. I love that shop and its fantastic owners, and I love this comfy cotton Cheap Monday plaid jumper/ dress. (More jumpers I love/ want here.) Also, can I just state that Cheap Monday does everything American Apparel does but does it better and without papering enormous crotches across major urban intersections/ your browser.

ADORBS ALERT: Tarina Tarantino Feather Drop Earri

($70, Tarina Tarantino, Karmaloop.com)

I'm ruving these Tarina Tarantino feather/ rhinestone drop earrings. Most of you (meeeee tooo included) immediately think of Disney when you think Tarina Tarantino, and while I love her signature Disney pieces too, I love these feathery earrings -- espesh the '70s-meets-nows juxtaposish between the old-school roach clip feathers and the mall punk colors. Can't handle bright pink and electric blue? Go more old-school roach clip:

($72, Tarina Tarantino, Karmaloop.com)

Also, two things: Karmaloop ALWAYS has promo codes. Try sn23820. AND, I met Tarina Tarantino! She ruuuuuuuules!

Chanel? No. Obey? Yes!

I love this black quilted laptop bag inspired by Chanel's classic black quilted bag:

($96, Obey, Karmaloop)

Sure, it's Obey and not Chanel, but it's also not like $2,000. AND, it's got a tiny row of pyramid studs! SCORE! You can get it at Karmaloop, where promo codes are a dime a dozen! And I like dimes, and I like dozens.

+ Try any of these Karmaloop promo codes:
MO9333 = 20% off
MS29093 = 20% off
KH28064 = 20% off
JK28278 = 20% off

Rain, Rain, COME AGAIN SO I CAN WEAR THESE CUTE CHOOKA BOOTS!

($50.95, Chooka, Karmaloop.com)

Love these buffalo check Chooka rain boots, and you don't see lace-up rain boots often, so esstra snaps for that! PLUS, you can get 30% off with promo code FRESCA. Only prob, for me anyway, is that they don't have size 8. Wah. Size 9 seems too biggie biggie biggie. Lotsa sizes (but for mora dollars) at Endless though.

Epic rain-related video, CCR, "Have You Ever Seen The Rain?"

Jog Into December In Some Snowjoggers

Winter is the most huzzah-worthy time of the year, IMO. I LOVE cold weather, I LOVE bundling up, and I LOVE anything that reminds me of growing up in the snowy arctic freeze that was winter in Cleveland, Ohio. Like, why don't they make Freaky Freezies in adult sizes, hm?

Anyway, I LURVE Snowjoggers winter boots because they're basically where a kid can be a kid... or whatever. Except they're for gwon-ups, but they come in bright, fun colors, and they're like moonboots but not as ridiculous.

I have a pair of the Sno-Coney blue, yellow, and red ones, which are like straight out of a Rainbow Brite Christmas special...

But I LOVE the new buffalo plaid ones from Fred Flare:

($88, Snowjoggers, Fred Flare)

... Or, check 'em in green and black from Karmaloop:

($80, Snowjoggers, Karmaloop)

+ Check out more Snowjoggers here.

Boot Binge: Modern Vintage, 80/20 & Ayla

It's a Monday evening boot binge, everybunnies! Three brands for you -- 80%20, Modern Vintage, and the amazing Ayla!

($450, Modern Vintage, Piperlime)

It's probably for the best that these don't come in my size. I LOVE the screw detailing! Are screws the new pyramid studs??? Also, i still DREAM of these Modern Vintage heels.

($230, 80%20, Karmaloop)

Kind of like how the more I look at my cat, the more completely perfect he becomes, the more I look at 80%20's Justine boots, the more awe-inspiring they are. One-inch heel, crinkled black leather with tan panels in an Art Deco-y design. AND a wide opening at the calf!?!? I gots the vapors! Oh, and apparently promo code FREE25 gets you free shipping, and that ain't nothin'! And again too also, the Justine boots come in Smoke too:

($199, Ayla, Shoe-Store.net)

LASTLY but MOST importantly, you simply MUST get your legs on some Ayla boots. I own the Tokyo style seen above -- the photo does NOT do them justice -- and they're phenomworthy. They're custom made to fit YOUR size, which means no cramming/ stuffing/ shoving/ shoehorning your normal-woman-sized legs into boots the width of pencils. Seriously, Mary-Kate recently had to return a pair of boots because they were too slim and SHE HERSELF IS SLIM! I don't get it. Now I'm not such a big girl, but I do got me some soccer player calves (minus the soccer and the playing), and too often I've practically busted a YKK trying to get some tall boots zipped up. Not so with these radicational Ayla boots:

You just send in your measurements and you get a ridiculously lush, luxe pair of leather boots TO FIT YOUR OWN PERSONAL SITUATION, for under $200! AND they come with spare instep liners to pad them out (I ordered a 9, even though I'm an 8 -- they fit perfectly.) Anyway the Tokyo style, pictured above, come up to just a few inches below my knee, and they ACTUALLY zip up with skinny jeans. Not lying. And again, not lying -- THEY'RE under $200. If you're not so into the criss-cross straps (too Mad Max for you?), check out the Milano -- they remind me of Coach or Cole Haan riding boots:

($189, Ayla, Shoe-Store.net)

Oh, and Shoe-Store.net has free shipping. It's like they're practically BUYING THEM FOR YOU! (And no, I don't work for Shoe-Store OR Ayla. I'm just THAT in hearts with these boots, which are totally comfy by the way.)

($189, Ayla, Shoe-Store.net)

I can't even deal with how gorgeous the Manhattan boots are! It's like they WALKED out of the early '70s!

($134, Ayla, Shoe-Store.net)

Um, hi. These are like Frye at like one-third of the price. Now THAT'S what I call recession busting!

Boat Shoes: Good & Bad

($45, Converse, Karmaloop)

So cute, so cheap!

($70, 80%20, Karmaloop)

So... never gonna happen.

+ More Fashionbinge boat shoe love here and a little here.

What's Up, Preppy? Or: Why the Hull Am I Pining For Boat Shoes?

I never grew up wealthy or preppy (oh but how I am SO both now!) but back in the day, when I was a kid in Cleveland, my middle-middle-class family managed to have a small power boat. A boat, in Cleveland, of all places. I used to hate going for rides on it -- all that choppy rocking, the frizz-inducing mist, peeing in a scary toilet that didn't flush. All that shit freaked me out. Then the Bush I recession hit (like father, like son), and we got rid of the boat -- ironically enough -- before we moved to boat-friendly Florida and then Virginia. Now that I am old enough to appreciate the things I didn't appreciate when I was little, I realize how nice it'd be to have nautical access, if only just for the outfits and cocktails. Maybe that's why I, like Fashionista, am sort of currently into the idea of boat shoes for summer footwear. Eek!

($69, Sperry, Zappos)

The absolute classics. Sure, they get sorta gnarly when you wear them all summer with no socks, but that's sort of the appeal. And they look cool when they've faded and get shiny and worn.

($69, Sperry, Amazon)

I don't think I could pull them off, but I like them in white too. Especially for dudes.

($45, Vans, Karmaloop)

Vans has, for some reason, gone prepster too with their take on boat shoes -- and a nice, femmey take, it is too. I'm sure somewhere, some dude in a ratty Vision tee, clinging to his Kurt Cobain haircut, is gently weeping.

More preppy footwear I'm feeling:

($43, Minnetonka, Buddysmoccasins.com)

In January, I used my awesome powers of prescience to predict that mocs would be on the move this spring. And I THINK I WAS RIGHT! Why? Um, because it's SPRING and I'm about to BUY these!

($58, Tretorn, Amazon)($59, Tretorn, Amazon)

I had a pair of Tretorns back in the day, and I recall that they were the most phenomenally soft, comf sneaks ever. I may need another pair.

($48, Sanuk, Swell)

Ah the surf-prep look. I like these, at the risk of being mistaken for an extra in a Jack Johnson video.

UPDATE: Oh hai! It's MK, all up in ur preppy post! I wanted to add that I am kinda pretty really into these bitches:



Vans boat shoes, $45.50, in HOT PINK. And that is why I like 'em, peeps. Hot pink shoes kinda go with everything! Yay!

Already, I Am Sick of Gladiator Sandals...

And it's barely even Spring!!! Seriously, unless you're actively involved in battling bears or guys who look like Russell Crowe, you do NOT need to encase you foot in a leather cage. Please. DON'T!

Some particularly egregious offenders:

($98, Jeffrey Campbell, Urban Outfitters)

If you're concerned that your cankle areas (for lack of a better term) are going to be chilly, MAYBE IT'S TOO COLD OUT FOR SANDALS! But you really truly do not get to do both.

($28, Urban Outfitters)

Dudes, fringe is not for shoes. Fringe is for jackets... no wait a second. Fringe is NOT FOR ANYONE outside of Branson (and I'm sure several of Branson's fine citizens don't even wear it). Don't ever wear fringe EVER. (One exception: you are Dolly Parton and/or 1967 Dennis Hopper.)

($57, Naughty Monkey, Karmaloop.com)
Seriously? What the shit??

($79, Nine West)

We get it. The American economy is in the shitter, so we're supposed to buy bright things to make us forget. I love bright things, but that's no reason to let the sandal equivalent of Bill Cosby's Coogi sweater creep up your foot.

($125, Urban Outfitters)

As if someone sent a perfectly okay jazz shoe through a paper shredder.

You get the point. So now, some lovely warm-weather footwear alternatives to the scourge of gladiators:

($48, Urban Oufitters)

Not my all-time favorites, but definitely not bad at all. At least there's no covered heel or ankle nonsense.

($105, Dolce Vita, Piperlime.com)

Perfectly reasonable, sweetly (note: not barfily) trendy metallic peep-toe that says "I'm a grown-up, and I'm perfectly mature about keeping MOST of my foot consistently -- not schizophrenically covered."

($105, Sam Edelman, Bloomingdale's)

Love both of these. (Very similar, cheaper ones here, BTW.) Wedge-y but not towering, which is more than I can say for these:

($29.50, Alloy.com)

Holy hell. Anyway, back to better spring shoes:

($175, Cole Haan, Bloomingdale's)

Rarely do I see white shoes I'd actually wear, but these are great (both versions!) all-purpose sping/ summer heeled sandals that completely do not suck or offend.

($365, Chie Mahara, Sodafine.com)

Sweet, sweet design. Sweet, sweet desire. It's like the Golden Gate Bridge found a happy home on your foot (minus the congestion and the jumpers.)

($375, Ralph Lauren, Bloomingdale's)

The price is a bit ridick for a bit of rope, and sure, they're a bit campy, but they're still fun in a WASPy sort of way. (And Ha'shem KNOWS I'm WASPY!) Though I'm not sure why you wouldn't just opt for Kinos -- Key West classics -- instead:

($11, KinoSandalFactory.com)

($11, KinoSandalFactory.com)


($41, Steve Madden)

It's not much, but it's right to the point and WORLDS better than the much-aligned flip-flop. HELP US HELP YOU!

Also, Steve Madden promo code:
$10 off: SML963BF1E (Not sure if this is a one-hitter or what.)

Finally, if sandals aren't your thing (and I get that), I like these ridiculous (and ridiculously priced!) Nikes:

($79, Nike, Alloy)

Do I offend???