Agent Provocateur's New Bridal Collection Means You Gets To Be Christina Hendricks On The Cover Of 'New York' Mag

If you, like me, Stan for Christina Hendricks (Joan from "Mad Men") AND like olde-tymey-looking lingerie, then rejoice! Agent Provocateur's new bridal collection is a.) gorj, and AND b.) goes up to an E cup. Often, if you're a chesty lady and you walk into a nice lingerie place, they all but LOL in your FACE and basically suggest you sew two C cups together and pray. So an E cup is, if you'll pardon me here, a "big" deal for lingerie. Especially bridal. My favorite of Agent Provocateur's new bridal line is the super retro "Thelma" skirted sweetheart body suit below. It's $390. Oh yeah, and I SWEAR I'll soon stop being lazy and post some wedding pix already, speaking of bridal shiz.

The MOST Beautiful Vintage 1950s Wedding Dresses Evar.

If you dream of wearing a 1950s vintage Mad Men-inspired wedding dress (though hopefully you don't aspire to a marriage like Joan or Betty's) AND have a waist that's less than like 27 inches, check out these dream-worthy vintage wedding dresses from Etsy seller Fab Gabs, who even styles her seller's photos so it looks as if she's partying like it's 1959.

($395, William Cahill, Fabgabs.etsy.com)

This dress has FIVE -- count 'em, FIVE -- Mcdreamy layers of tulle. You could be riding a bike or wearing snow pants under there and no one would know. It's so gorgeous I can barely breathe. Bury me in it. But leave the back unzipped, because this bad boy's got a 25" waist. Talk about waiting to exhale. (Shooby!) And credit where it's due -- The Bridal Wishlist scouted this one out!

($225, Fabgabs.etsy.com)

SIX layers of tulle! FOR WHEN FIVE will not do! It's SO beautiful, and I love the sweetheart neckline, but with a 28" underbust: 28" and 24" waist, I'd have to get several ribs removed and drink all my meals through a straw. Ah, but what price fashion? (Side note: the woman who sold me my wedding dress told me that a girl she sold a dress to had to cancel her final fitting because she'd starved herself to the point that she fell over and cracked her head open and had to get about 40 stitches. AHH, admirable committment!)

($250, Fabgabs.etsy.com)

My absolute favorite for that super lacey post-modern dash of Madonna.

PS -- I know I'm probably tardy to the party, but did you see Christina Hendricks on/ in In Style Weddings? (That's my only other non-barfy bridal mag besides New York Magazine Weddings.)

TEAM JOAN! Girl, you could do sidebends and sit-ups, but PLEASE don't lose that butt!

Awesome Wedding Ring Alert: Avindy

Check up on these gorgeous rings I found by mother-daughter jewelry design duo Avindy. They'd both make super unusual wedding rings, and, even more unusual, they're both under $400. Yes, really.

($310, Avindy, Havensonline.com)

I always love the hammered metal -- this ring's also available in white gold, which I'm sure is really gorgeous.

($375, Avindy.com)

This ring's a twelve-diamond (so I'm assuming it goes halfway around, which is perfect for the recession, because who even sees the back of your hand? You don't NEED diamonds there!), and it's pave. Perfect starter ring.

ALSO, sorry for the lack of postage lately -- Me and Cat's been BRIDALING up a STORM, literally -- I was at an AWESOME wedding in the Finger Lakes, where it RAINED like woah, cleared up for 30 minutes, leaving just enough time for the bride and groom to do the damn thing, and then the second they kissed, there was a huge clap of thunder -- the heavens approved! Then, of course, it poured again, and there was a gorgeous rainbow. NICE WORK, R&D! AAAANNNND, Cat's OWN wedding is like FOUR SECONDS AWAY! GAHHH!

Michael C Fina Wedding & Engagement Ring Sample Sale! HOLLAR!

Dudefaces. Are y'awl in the market to be buying up a wedding ring or engagement ring? Yah? Mkay GREAAAAT because Michael C. Fina is having a sample sale in-store at 545 Fifth Avenue.
It's August 4 - 6, 11a.m.-8p.m, and the sitch is you get can save up to 70% off brands like Vera Wang, Scott Kay, Tacori, Jeff Cooper, Verragio, and several other brands I've never heard of because I don't sit around reading about wedding rings all day. But I do know what 70% off means, you know? Okay, that's as much as I know.

Leather Bridal Bracelets -- Because You Just Don't See Enough Of Those

($107, Littmack, Manjoh.com)

ZOMG I love these soft leather embroidered Littmarck bracelets. The grey one is wedding-able, no?

($55, Day Birger et Mikkelsen, Manjoh.com)

Also, speaking of Manjoh, uh, this Day Birger et Mikkelsen necklace is on cuckoo sale. Ahhh! #linebetweenwantsandneedssteadilyblurring

Crystal Jewelry I MUST Own...

A few sparkly, spangly little crystal "treasures," as Makeup Loves Me LOVES to refer to jewelry...

($573, Lanvin, Luisaviaroma.com)

Not in a MILLION minutes would I have ever thought I'd be sitting here attracted to jewelry featuring DENIM. But Lanvin done did it with this slightly '90s bracelet.

($475, Swarovski)

CAN. YOU. EVEN? C.Y.E. It's like wearing a crystal kaleidoscope on your NECK! And I NEED TO DO THAT.

($154, Martine Wester)

ADORING this gorgeous vintage-inspired mismatched crystal rosette bracelet, and I'm seriously considering getting it to wear with my Jenny Packham wedding dress, as long as it complements the jewels on the dress itself and doesn't snag the silk. Check out more of Martine Wester's pretty crystal pieces.

($262, Iosselliani, Bonadrag.com)

At first everyone was like OHHH WOOOH OMFG STACKABLE RINGS! IT'S THE SECOND MF-ING COMING OF HAYSOOS CHRISTO. And I was like Snoreaphyll. Truly, I didn't give a rat's ass about stackable rings. UNTIL... I came across these Iosselliani vintage-inspired stackable rings. And now I'm as TEAM STACKABLE RING as YOU are Team Edward! Rawr!

Bridal Binge: Ring Edition, Vol. 3

With less than three months to go, I really need to get a wedding band up in this piece. I keep going to stores and finding things that would probably work but that I'm not 100% in love with. And oughtn't one to be entirely in love with the one piece of jewelry they'll wear forever? (Unless you're like my friend Alison, who keeps buying herself new engagement and wedding bands, which seems like a perfectly acceptable and fun option also.) Here's a few I'm thinking about right now, although I plan on hitting jewelry stores both at lunch and after work today. (I wore comfortable shoes.)

Oh, but first. So you know. Here is my engagement ring:



It's by Sholdt. I love its modern simplicity and feel so lucky that Carl got it so right.



Piaget mini "Possession" ring, $1,500 with diamonds in 18k white gold; $900 sans bling. That top part spins! I like this because it seems different but is still classic, with clean modern lines. And there are seven diamonds for good luck. And Eva Longoria has one!

Yesterday I went to one of Alison's favorite jewelry haunts, DVVS in Chelsea. The woman who helped me was very nice, and they had some nice rings for very reasonable prices. For the first time I think I had reverse sticker shock. This ring, for instance:



A modified version of this is currently a serious contender. I'd want it a lot slimmer, with the line centered, and maybe more and smaller diamonds more spread out. Or not. They do custom work so it's all up to me. This ring is only $450, looks great with my engagement ring, and is supercomfortable.



Kevin Plunkett organic twist band, $455. Now, I know this looks extremely "organic," as in it looks like the gold version of what a child might make with a snake of clay, but I swear it looked pretty good with my ring in the store. This picture is TERRIBLE and in person the ring really doesn't look anything like it does here. I liked that it had interesting lines and texture but didn't compete with my ring. It's still sort of in the running.



Links of London Triple Ring, $190. It's in sterling silver, though.



This Ritani eternity band is kinda cool, too.



I don't think this one is quite me (not so into mixing metals), but I wanted to point out that I think Nina Dinoff's alterna-eternity band is very cool. It's $195 for sterling silver and 18k gold dots.



Finally, I love the idea of this ring, Hearts On Fire's Felicity pointed wedding band. The pointed tip echoes the notched setting of my engagement ring. But there's a lotta bling there, and it would almost certainly compete with the e-ring. I think.

I'm almost afraid to say it, but what do YOU think?

Two Great (Bridal) Shoes, Two Very Different Prices

Recently I thought I found the absolute purrrrfect wedding shoe: The Stuart Weitzman "Oboe."



Wedge so you don't sink in the grass, extremely cute bow, dyeable to any color your heart or shoe man can dream up...just utterly best. Except for the price tag: $360. That could pay for, say, a second reception dress! Sadly, the Oboe was not a play I could make.

Turns out I'm gonna be sinking in the grass (hopefully not too much), because I did just go ahead and buy those oft-discussed Melissa Anglomania shoes with the red hearts (from Epaulet, of course). But if I was getting married inside? I'd totally go for these:




Nina Electra pump in ivory, $80. Again: $80. Someone, please, get married in these!

Then go on your island honeymoon and wear these wherever you go:



Steven "Bianna" sandal, $120. (Or purchase the identical knockoff at Alloy, as I will. Thanks to Cheap Chicas for the tip!)

In other shoe news, I think I'll get these huaraches for the summer:



Jeffrey Campbell "Gloria Tie" sandals, $84.

Jenny Packham Trunk Show At Mark Ingram Bridal Atelier

Brides and bridal types who love reading about bridal stuff -- I think/ hope I'm gonna get my dress this weekend! Weeeee! I have an appointment at Mark Ingram Bridal Atelier (they're having a Jenny Packham trunk show May 14 - 16). I went to Mark Ingram earlier this year for a sample sale and had SUCH a pleasant, non-pushy, non-bridal-factory experience, and one of the seriously non-pushy saleswomen (I know -- I couldn't believe it either) brought me a Jenny Packham sample dress. Unexpectedly, I feel in love with it, basically said Yes to that dress ;p and on Saturday, I'm going back to try it on and a few more Jenny Packham dresses (I figured I might as well since I'm not in any hurry) and... um, yeah. I guess I'm maybe gonna get a dress! A Jenny Packham dress. Woah.

I'm not posting a photo of the exact dress here because SOMEONE's being all superstitious, but here's a sampling of some of Jenny Packham's old-Hollywood style.

Oh, and I'll of course let you, the interested bridal sorts, know how my Mark Ingram experience went -- I've only heard great things about their customer service, and my few experiences so far have been great (the sample sale, promptness returning phone calls, oh yeah, and when I first tried on the Jenny Packham dress at that sample sale, I guess I really must've been that excited, because I accidentally left my cell phone and a necklace there, and they were very good about getting them back to me), so I'll let you know how it went.

By the way, the first photo is the Jenny Packham Rosalind dress I love dearly but it's around $5,000. Not happening. The bottom photo is from Jenny Packham's Spring 2009 runway collection. The two right above that are from Jenny Packham's Spring 2010 bridal collection.

Temperley London Bridal Open House In NYC: Saturday April 25

Bridal sorts in NYC. DEFINITELY do go check out the Temperley London bridal open house this Saturday, April 25.

Details:
Saturday, April 25, 2009
10am-6pm

Temperley London Boutique
453 Broome Street, 2nd Floor, NYC

Featuring:
Temperley London's Newly Launched
Made-to-Order & Off-the-Peg bridal collections
La Perla Intimates
Ron Ben-Israel Cakes
Mr. Boddington's stationery
Thom James Flowers

RSVP Krystina Banahasky at 212.219.2929
KrystinaB@temperleylondon.com

I went to Temperley a few weeks ago and tried on a few dresses. Temperley wedding dresses are phenomenal on every level -- lots of flowy, goddessy, Deco-inspired glam dresses, plus some lacy pieces too, and whimsical accents like butterflies. Below are a few of my favorites. Oh, and the Temperley boutique is so amazingly designed that you will want to MOVE IN PERMANENTLY. And Krystina at Temperley is fantastic and the least pushy salesperson I've met in my entire wedding dress-shopping experience.


Adria -- one of my favorites. Check out the beautiful yellow and white detailing.

Faun -- more of that gorgeous Deco-y butterfly detail.

Jean -- one of my favorites. It was so fun to try on and actually really flattering across my midsection, but my stooopid chest wasn't having it. Still, an immaculate piece of work. (Both the dress AND my chest -- HEYOHHHH!)



Zora dress. It's about $2,990. Far more beautiful in person. I was strongly considering this dress.

The Catronia. The show pony. Seriously, this is my dream dress right here.

+ Not in New York? Check out Temperley bridal here. (Thanks, "Internet!")

You TOO Can Wear Carrie Bradshaw's Sex And The City Vivienne Westwood Wedding Dress

Like OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH my GOD, you guys! After we finish sipping our Cosmos and talking about how we LOOOOVE to bang dudes the way DUDES like to bang chicks, and then we TOOOOOTally flip out shoes and like, go to restaurants we can mysteriously afford even though we have fake jobs, THEN you can go watch me try on fictitious person Carrie Bradshaw's almost-actual wedding dress that she wore in the Sex And The City movie. (Before Big left her at the altar, right? I didn't actually see the movie, but with all the of second-coming-of-Christ-like ballyhoo over it, I managed to pick up on the fact that Big left Carrie standing there. Spoiler!)

If you live in Charlotte, North Carolina and pop into Hayden Olivia and have, say, a Charlotte York bank account, the Vivienne Westwood Gold Label Lily dress can be YOURS, peaches, for the TOTALLY reasonable sum of $15,000! So you too CAN DRESS JUST LIKE CARRIE BRADSHAW (not a real person!) on your wedding day! You don't even have to THINK about what you as your own actual thinking, blinking person might like! Just quickly refer to the LEAST original, MOST cliched idea of a bride EVAR, call your bank and ask for an extension on your line of credit, and SHAMWOW! It's like you're ACTUALLY CARRIE!

Watch this lady try not to shit herself over the honor of carrying the Carrie dress at her bridal salon. (Also, what you can't see is that the lady's like subtly fingerbanging herself in this video because it is just THAT awesome that the shop is carrying the Carrie dress. So awesome that she can't keep her hands out of her pants. I mean seriously, she's beaming like she fucking just cured cancer.)

... Or, save yourself like $9,000, and get it on Net-a-Porter.com.

While I do DESPISE Sex And The City (except for some of the clothes) and its absurd cultish followings and the cliches it inforces -- cliches that, sadly, a lot of people believe in -- I have nothing against Vivienne Westwood, God knows. This dress is stunning. It's just the idea of DRESSING like Carrie Bradshaw on your effing WEDDING day that gives me the simultaneous Hebrew Jeebies and sad face. Come on, ladies. You can do better than this! Like, instead of being CARRIE BRADSHAW on your wedding day, you could... I don't know... BE YOURSELF!? (Yay?) Also, Cosmos are super disgusting and really really out. DO NOT order them. Ever. Don't even make them in the privacy of your own home. Let Cosmos GO. They're done. 'Kay night night!