Two Pieces Of Jewelry I Won't Be Buying

($695, Haute Hippie, Shopbop.com)

This is some Mad Max ish that looks like someone attached some chains to road kill. And I'm uncomfortable with it.

($21.95, Neivz, Amazon.com)

Though not as uncomfortable as I am with this boobs ring! It's fine to have boobs, and fine to have rings, but I'm uncomfortable standing having arrived at the intersection of both. It's an intersection that just doesn't need to exist.

No, Really, YOU'RE WELCOME.

($300, Sterling Bartlett, Bloodisthenewblack.com)

All that's missing from illustrator Sterling Bartlett's "You're Welcome" ring is a Kanye shrug. He already threw the Black Sabbath lyric into the inside and a rat on the outside. I just love the how the font itself basically implies that this is the "f--- you" version of "you're welcome." The nastiest "you're welcome" of them all.

(Credit/ Copyright: Sterling Bartlett)

Double-Finger Rings And Things

I'm generally not all about two-finger or double-finger rings, but I'll brake for this one:

($158, Nissa Jewelry)

Love the Dijon mustard-colored stone, the slightly goth-y prongs, and the surrounding jewels. I just kinda wish it came in a single-digit version. I need all my fingers free to gesticulate! So sue me!

($88, Nissa Jewelry)

The stackable jeweled rings? Just as cute! Which to get? Which to get? It's a cuteness conundrum!

Oh that YSL ring

I think I need to buy myself the YSL Arty ring sometime in the very near future. It is beautiful!

Source: google.com

On My Binge List: Erica Weiner Watch O'er You Ring

($80, Erica Weiner, Bonadrag.com)

For reals, I'm daydreaming about my future when I blog about cute and horrible clothes with this brass ring on my right ring finger. If it looks super olde-tymey, that's because it is. It's inspired by a 19-century wax seal found in a Glasgow antique shop, and it reads "May it watch o'er you." It's like a cross between an evil eye charm, a Cracker Jack treasure, and a Ouija board. Hey, speaking of, wanna see a magic trick? Watch me make $80 magically disappear from my bank account! Poof!

Deep Love

I want them all!

Low Luv x Erin Wasson

shopbop

//I Like It Heavy//

Rings from Dannijo. Love.

netaporter

HOLY SHIT. ANN TAYLOR HAS STEPPED IT THE EFF UP IN THE MOST REAL WAY

Yesterday I had THE MOST vile experience ATTEMPTING to browse wedding rings at Michael C. Fina -- they barely acknowledged my presence. Maybe they're not in the habit of... selling... fine jewelry? To people willing to pay good money for fine jewelry??? Seriously? I had to ASK the woman behind the counter for help. And I was the ONLY PERSON IN THE STORE. Ew. Sure, I was wearing fuchsia leather fingerless gloves, so she perhaps assumed I was a drug addict or a thief or something (wrong on both counts). In actually, I interested in what they had for sale. Sorry, but my father and my fiance's father were both in sales, and you never know who you're turning down or turning away. (In this case, A PERSON WITH A BLOG! Who's not afraid to share her shitty experience with the reading public! Three other friends told me they had same experience trying to shop there. Since when do you need to "TRY" to shop??) So turn away, I did. But not before I noticed they had like the TACKIEST crap for sale near the door -- Ed Hardy-esque flame-lick cuff links and stuff. EW. I headed over to the diamond district, which, sure, can be sharky, but people actually TOOK their time to talk to me like they gave a shit as I attempted to look for a piece of jewelry that symbolizes my love and committment to my partner. So thank you, diamond district dudes, for giving a shit. And fuck you, lady who works at Michael C Fina, for not giving a shit. Because I'm trying to buy my WEDDING rings, so yes, I do give a shit.

SOOOOOO, long story longer, after that, I stopped into Ann Taylor because they had sparkly things in the window. AND OH MY GOD. Ann Taylor has SEEEEEEEEEEEERIOUSLY stepped it ALL the way the fuck up and gone from Grandma to Grand-NAW! Like, such an epic makeover it's like when Sandy goes from boring to whoring at the end of Grease. Except obviously neither Sandy nor Ann Taylor is/ are whores.

Okay, check out ALL of the super cute things I found at Ann Taylor online that I would wear in a single solitary heartbeat.

($65, AnnTaylor.com)

WHO among us would NOT wear this amazement chunky statement necklace? NOT I! I can tell you that much.

($120, AnnTaylor.com)

Um, I'm sorry, but ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I can no longer separate rational needs from irrational wants when confronted with this metallic jacquard leopard-print skirt, Ann!

($85, AnnTaylor.com)

Lately all I can think about is Glee and sequiny things. Unsurprisingly. This sequined tank top is as perfect as Puck.

($175, AnnTaylor.com)

ANN! WTF! I LOVE this grey slouchy boot! Seriously!? Jamaican me CRAZY!

($175, AnnTaylor.com)

Ann! It's cool, not tryin' to put a rush on you. I just wanna let you know that I got a crush on you.

($100, AnnTaylor.com)

ANN! It's like you CREPT into my closet and KNEW I have the BEST orange suede vintage jacket that this would complement PERFECTLY! GAH! Ann, it's like you know me better than I know myself. You devil, you!

Hi! A whole Chanel-inspired outfit! Bar jacket and all! I ADORE YOU, ANN!

Blowing My Mind Right Now: Iossellani Skull Cluster Ring

($363, Iossellani, ForwardForward.com)

Once again, line between need and wants grows even hazier and hazier.

More gorj jewelry that confounds my understanding of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs:
+ Crystal fixations
+ Littmarck leather bracelets!
+ Tarina Tarantino jewelry I <3
+ Avindy diamond rings for UNDER $400 (yahrly!)

Crystal Jewelry I MUST Own...

A few sparkly, spangly little crystal "treasures," as Makeup Loves Me LOVES to refer to jewelry...

($573, Lanvin, Luisaviaroma.com)

Not in a MILLION minutes would I have ever thought I'd be sitting here attracted to jewelry featuring DENIM. But Lanvin done did it with this slightly '90s bracelet.

($475, Swarovski)

CAN. YOU. EVEN? C.Y.E. It's like wearing a crystal kaleidoscope on your NECK! And I NEED TO DO THAT.

($154, Martine Wester)

ADORING this gorgeous vintage-inspired mismatched crystal rosette bracelet, and I'm seriously considering getting it to wear with my Jenny Packham wedding dress, as long as it complements the jewels on the dress itself and doesn't snag the silk. Check out more of Martine Wester's pretty crystal pieces.

($262, Iosselliani, Bonadrag.com)

At first everyone was like OHHH WOOOH OMFG STACKABLE RINGS! IT'S THE SECOND MF-ING COMING OF HAYSOOS CHRISTO. And I was like Snoreaphyll. Truly, I didn't give a rat's ass about stackable rings. UNTIL... I came across these Iosselliani vintage-inspired stackable rings. And now I'm as TEAM STACKABLE RING as YOU are Team Edward! Rawr!

Bridal Binge: Ring Edition, Vol. 3

With less than three months to go, I really need to get a wedding band up in this piece. I keep going to stores and finding things that would probably work but that I'm not 100% in love with. And oughtn't one to be entirely in love with the one piece of jewelry they'll wear forever? (Unless you're like my friend Alison, who keeps buying herself new engagement and wedding bands, which seems like a perfectly acceptable and fun option also.) Here's a few I'm thinking about right now, although I plan on hitting jewelry stores both at lunch and after work today. (I wore comfortable shoes.)

Oh, but first. So you know. Here is my engagement ring:



It's by Sholdt. I love its modern simplicity and feel so lucky that Carl got it so right.



Piaget mini "Possession" ring, $1,500 with diamonds in 18k white gold; $900 sans bling. That top part spins! I like this because it seems different but is still classic, with clean modern lines. And there are seven diamonds for good luck. And Eva Longoria has one!

Yesterday I went to one of Alison's favorite jewelry haunts, DVVS in Chelsea. The woman who helped me was very nice, and they had some nice rings for very reasonable prices. For the first time I think I had reverse sticker shock. This ring, for instance:



A modified version of this is currently a serious contender. I'd want it a lot slimmer, with the line centered, and maybe more and smaller diamonds more spread out. Or not. They do custom work so it's all up to me. This ring is only $450, looks great with my engagement ring, and is supercomfortable.



Kevin Plunkett organic twist band, $455. Now, I know this looks extremely "organic," as in it looks like the gold version of what a child might make with a snake of clay, but I swear it looked pretty good with my ring in the store. This picture is TERRIBLE and in person the ring really doesn't look anything like it does here. I liked that it had interesting lines and texture but didn't compete with my ring. It's still sort of in the running.



Links of London Triple Ring, $190. It's in sterling silver, though.



This Ritani eternity band is kinda cool, too.



I don't think this one is quite me (not so into mixing metals), but I wanted to point out that I think Nina Dinoff's alterna-eternity band is very cool. It's $195 for sterling silver and 18k gold dots.



Finally, I love the idea of this ring, Hearts On Fire's Felicity pointed wedding band. The pointed tip echoes the notched setting of my engagement ring. But there's a lotta bling there, and it would almost certainly compete with the e-ring. I think.

I'm almost afraid to say it, but what do YOU think?

Ariel Gordon: Not-Boring Wedding Rings For Not A Fortune

($1,240, Ariel Gordon)

Check out L.A. jewelry designer Ariel Gordon's wonderfully modern geometrical 14-karat gold "Hex" ring with diamond points. I'd definitely wear this as a wedding ring (except I'm going to try to uphold the Jewish tradition of wearing a solid, unbroken band with no ornamentation or stones.) Of course, I'd wear it ANYWAY as a REGULAR ring if someone would like to purchase it for me, say, as a gift for being an awesome blogger. The Hex ring also comes in 10-karat gold for $880.

I love how modern and clean it is but also quietly chic AND kind of looks like a nut. Not like a squirrel nut but like whatever people who use tools use for things.

Also, Ariel won Shopstyle's emerging designer competition, so if you enter "SHOPSTYLE" on Ariel Gordon's site, you can get 25% off your purchase!... Of the Hex ring... for me!

... Plus, check out Spike pendant:

($315, Ariel Gordon)

Which would look positively smart AND menancing with... EVERYTHING (on me!)

The First Wedding Ring I Really Like

Wedding bands are so boring. A circle of diamonds? Snooze. I want something simple, sure, but with a twist. Perhaps literally. We'll see. But tonight I found this awesome, awesome ring, with a little hidden diamond. You can wear it with the diamond facing you, or so it's facing out. I'd probably keep it as my little secret. I'm comforting myself with the fact that it's wider than I think I want a band to be, because goddamn, this thing is over $5k. (That's the price for platinum, and I want a silver metal; yellow gold is obviously cheaper, but it doesn't come in white gold.) Isn't it excellent, though?





Neissing "Refuge" ring, $2864 for yellow gold and $5552 for platinum 6mm bands.

Anybody got any tips on sources for unusual wedding bands like this?

UPDATE: I am further comforted by a friend's reference to this ring as both "wacky" and "Diamond Clitoris."

Accidental Marc By Marc Jacobs Gem Ring Purchase

You know how like if you're trying to diet (zzzzzzzzzzz), and you totally deprive yourself and deprive yourself and then suddenly you go effing bonkers and eat like four pizzas in 14 seconds while standing over the sink? And then you scrape the cheese goo off the box top? And then you eat the box? Right, so well that's what's been happening lately since I've been trying not to buy stuff. My attempts to hold back have totally backfired, and I've been going on binges to the effing XXXXXTREEEEME. The plus side: some of the things I've ordered online haven't fit, so I've returned them but still fulfilled the urge to hit the "buy" button, as my friend put in.

Anyway, one thing I HOPE fits is this Marc By Marc Jacobs Abstract Gem ring I randomly bought, for a song!, last night on Zappos:

($55.80, Marc By Marc Jacobs, Zappos.com)

Also great in black:

I Love Pamela Love's Peacock Ring

It's a peacock! It's a ring! It's got sapphires! It's all over but the cryin'!

($400, Pamela Love, Bonadrag)

+ More peacock pursuits.
+ More Bonadrag Binges.

Got $16? Get Fred Flare's Golden Rhinestone Blossom Ring!

($16, Fred Flare)

Love this semi-conservative, granny-chic, vintage-looking faux gold and rhineystones ring from my favey humans, Fred Flare! BTW, Fred Flare now has their own TAXI ADS! I will up and PLOTZ when I see one, especially if I see the elusive SUV cab! Those are the bee's KNEEZY, WHEEZY! The only thing that'd make this better would be hailing a Fred Flare cab, opening up the door and discovering it was really CASH CAB!

+ Speaking of rhinestones, here's David Hasselhoff, unfortunately, singing "Rhinestone Cowboy."

FashionBinge's News You Can Use: Topshop Delayed On Account Of Drankin', Non-Traditional Committment Rings, Brooklyn Target Still A Total Mess

+ More on that ever-delayed New York Topshop opening: Seems Topshop's applied for a ground-floor liquor license (!?!??!?!?), and the community board's all like "Sorry, ma'am. You're gonna have to finish that before you go in." WHO THE FUCK CARES about boozin' while you're cruisin' for deals? Just LET ME SHOP (or at least browse -- THANKS, downturn!) already! (Racked)

+ Maje LuLs: "Difficult To Tell If T.J. Maxx Hit Hard By Recession." Best part: "Further evidence of T.J. Maxx's imminent foreclosure or, possibly, its wholly unaffected condition, included reports of shoppers rummaging through barrels of lamps up to their shoulders, multiple sightings of bras stuffed into children's shoes, the impromptu sale of in-store display cases for cash, and an excess of golf-based giftware." (The Onion)

+ Refinery29 has 20 non-traditional "I do" rings that aren't a snooze. My fave are the Alex + Chloe rings, which certainly don't have to be worn as weddin grings. The square 14k gold versions are available at RevolveClothing, and the one right thurrr's is Alex + Chloe's Inverted Triple White Diamond Ring, made of oxidized silver, and it's under a Kspot. (Refinery29)

+ You say bike shorts, I say no. (Refinery29)

+ Hey, if you dress your tiny dog like JonBenét Ramsey, you probably deserve to go to jail. (Jezebel)

+ Fucked In Park Slope posted another amazing (and, sadly, completely accurate) account of attempting to "shop" at Brooklyn's Atlantic Yards Target. Tears.

FIPS Undercover II: Target Sucks (Brooklyn, NY) from Effed in Park Slope on Vimeo.

Jacquie Aiche Panther and Snake Rings!

I lurve all the snake stuff Refinery 29's on top of, but what of the panther! It should NOT be overlooked!

($318, Jacquie Aiche)

She's also got a great snake ring too:

Call 310-854-2750 to order. And/ or get her gorgeous evil eye necklace online:

($350, Jacquie Aiche, MadisonLosAngeles.com)